come and follow me, i will bring you home

a couple days ago i posted about meeting with my parish's young adult group. well, we met today and it was quite interesting! see, when the lady from the church contacted me, i assumed she simply wanted to point me in the direction of the YA group so that i could be a member. after further conversations and emails, i got the feeling that she wanted to be more than a member. boy, was i right.

i came to the meeting not knowing what to expect, but i told god in my prayers that i would be open to wherever he wanted to take me, as long as he would be there to help. the lady introduced me to the core group of YA's, and we all had a mini faith sharing about where we came from, who we are, and where our relationship with god was. towards the end of the meeting, she proposed that i be the "leader" or advisor to the group. i was truly taken aback! she had no idea who i was...she only knew that i had a bit of "experience" with YA's, yet she trusted me enough to be an advisor?!

after she left the meeting and i was alone with the core group, i confessed to them that all i wanted to do was join and be a member. however, if they needed me to be more than that, i would definitely be open to it. i told them that i would do whatever they wanted me to do, because all i wanted was to serve. i had a flashback to last sunday when father mentioned in his homily that we should all take life as it comes. deal with what god gives you, and have faith that all will turn out ok. i tried to keep this in mind during our conversations, because i really started to get scared. i am afraid to take on so much responsibility so fast...i'm afraid to have these people depend on me to lead them. i guess it's that fear that helped me realized i was doing the right thing. when i was chosen to be a leader in liwanag, i was afraid. the person who chose me told me that if i wasn't afraid, then it wasn't meant to be.

since i've moved back i've always been searching for a way back to the church. i've been wanting to be more than just a sunday church goer. i always felt like he was calling me toward something, but i didn't know what. i'm not entirely sure if this is it, but i'm rolling with it.

i'm going to have to dig up the binders and email my resources (ahem, kirs and fran and angie) to help me remember all the stuff we used to do. i even mentioned to them my affiliations with log, audience, and dwtl, and they already want to do a socal trip to get ideas and more inspiration! i really hope my socal peeps would be willing to help me out on this one.... ;) they also have had no exposure to praise music! (i know! what a tragedy!) i'm hoping to especially help out in this department.

in liwanag, we'd always tell our members that our mission was to spread light to those in darkness. how easily we sometimes forget about this mission when we graduate and move on in our lives. i know i forgot...and quickly. maybe i wasn't ready to do it all again a couple years ago. who knows if i'm ready now? i certainly am not sure...but what i am sure of is that i trust god. if this is what he wants from me, i'll do my best to oblige.

so right now i'd like to ask you all for prayers -- prayers for the group and prayers for myself, that we do what is right in the eyes of God, and that we take our inspiration from the Holy Spirit. i've gotten through many difficult and challenging times due largely in part to the prayers of those i love, and i hope this time is no different.