choices, pt. 2

i choose love.

there could be many reasons why the Lord chose to take our baby away. there could be just one. i don’t know if i'll ever fully understand it, but through the sorrow and tears, there is love. and that is the reason i choose to believe in.

when i married david, i knew i loved him and believed in the vows we made before God. i knew that God chose him to be my soul mate. but it wasn’t until this whole ordeal did i realize why he was chosen for me. david was the only voice i listened to through my tears. he was the only one that made sense. he was the only one who understood what i was going through. he never got tired of how depressed i was; he never made me feel like i should be “over it” already. david was the one who kept reassuring me that our baby was with God, and that one day, God would bless us with the child we wanted. he helped me to realize that choosing to love and trust in God, even when it seemed like God turned His back on us, was essential for us to survive.

i didn’t think it was possible for me to fall deeper in love with david, but i did. and if taking my baby away was God’s way of waking me up and telling me that i needed to choose love over all else, the i can accept what happened. 

i choose love.